


A Supremely Suspicious Valentine' Day

by TeruTeruObliterator11037



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Crack, Intentionally Bad Spelling & Grammar, Kirumi Sells Livers On The Black Market, M/M, Oh My Gosh I Miss Chik Fil A, They Go To Chik Fil A, Valentine's Day, What Have I Done, quick history lesson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 11:09:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9721577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeruTeruObliterator11037/pseuds/TeruTeruObliterator11037
Summary: Ouma tries to impress Amami with a creative date on Valentine's Day! Does it work? Read on to find out!





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hello ny'all! I hope that you guys had an awesome Valentine's Day! I apologize if this fic is really choppy and bad, I had to quickly type this up while preparing for other things! I truly do hope you enjoy this fic!

It wa s Valentine’ s day,,

The anniveraey of Saynt Valentine;s death

He was beaheded 

how romantic

,,

,-

,but that s not hte point

We arent talking bout that dangling granpa

This story is about a boi named kokitcher uoma 

Kokichi ouma

 , and his hopeles love for rantaro amami, a veyr attractive lad, yum yum

Houma Simpson wanted to impress the boy for Valentines Day. However, he didn’t know how. Therefore, he chose to talk to a classmate who might have had more of a metier in romance.

.

.

.

.

AYYYYYYYYY JUYUST KIDDING EXXXX DEEEEEEEEEE

BOI DID YOU LEGIT JUST SAY THAT YOU THOUGHT,,,,,,,,,,,,,SHSL SUMPREME MEME OUMA KOKITCHI WAS ACTUALLLY,,,,,GONNA,,POLITELY AKS FOR,,,,HELP?

,welll like sure he needed help but like golly gosh he wasnt gonna ask for it

 Anyways

Ouma began to contemplate the situation, biting his lips until they were bleeding. 

Tears began to pour down his face holes, but he had to hold it in, he had to be strong. 

But that’s when he found out,,,,,

He Needed Help

He Needed To Ask For Help

Shoot

Sooooooooo anywho he made his way downtown walking fast, etc when he saw the perfect romantic encyclo pedia, 

Keebler chan

Kiibo

If someone knew about love, it would bee him

Rpbots are supposed to be smart, , right?

“Hey,, Kiibae,” kokicti smirked, “got any  _ romantic advice _ ?” 

“Was?”

“Ok Google, I; wanna confess to amama, how do i do it?”

“Hm,”

“Cmoooonnnnnnnnnnnnnn”

“Invite him to a lighthearted area that you both enjoy, and just chat, and bring the topic up.”

,,,

silecne

“Um, thanks, but no thanks, robots suck at romance. If you can’t hit a dab right, there’s no way I should trust you with my love life.”

(The whole spiel about robots being good at romance was a lie,,,,,,,just tryna keep ya onya toes)

“What happened to your grammar?”

“,um sorry but what im gonna sue,”

“THATS MY LINE”

So anyway ouma wen t from the halllwaye to the cafeteria,

The cafeteria was this one, big room

full of bad meanies

And we stunting like

Gucci Gucci, Louis Louis, Fendi Fendi, Prada

Basic white girls wear that stuff so I don't even bother

Gucci Gucci, Louis Louis, Fendi Fendi, Prada

The basic white girls wear that stuff, so I don't even bother

I put that on my partner, I put that on my family

Oakland city represent, address me as your majesty

Yeah you can kiss the ring, but you can never touch the crown

At the corner of the room there was SHSL Minute Maid

*tojo

)Darn autocorrecct)

So ouma decided to ask tojo about somehting

“hey,,,, tojo “

“Yes? What seems to bee the problem?”

“You got any of the,,,good stuff,,, for Dalentine’s Vay?”

‘Mhmmm, whatcha need”

“mmmhM, whatcha got”

“I got a liver’

“Human liver?”

‘Nah thats expensive”

“How bout rat liver from like a rat that died pea cefu;;y in the wild due to old age, never to be touched by the corporate hand’

“Nuhuh son no can do”

“Fsdujfhdsfndfjndsdufeje WHAT  DO YOU HAVE”

“I gotta fake liver , yanno the types they use on those hospital shows”

“Nah whatesle you got”

“Five popsicle sticks, a LeapFrog game, a preserved free sample from costco, two bags of frozen french toast sticks i got from hoshi, and an expired whole foods gift card.”

“I’ll take em all,” ouma said, “how much is it?”

“Twelve dollers, or maybe the foot of your wax statue of amami you have in your room.”

“‘Buy me a bottle of panta and maybe ill say yes”

“K”

And so ouma bought the gifts for amami

The real issue was asking the boi out.

At the other edge of the cafeteria, rantaro was readijg a book about aliens, that hooligan

“Hey amameme,”

Silence

“HEADS UP AMAMI CHAN IM A DEAD BOI WALKING”

“HEY-YO WESTERBERG”

you wanna go on a date w/ me?”

“Sure, I’d Be Pleased.”

((CREDITS MUSIC))))

Epilouge

They went to chik fil a together and fed each other waffle fries. It was pretty kyoot actually. They ordered an ice cream cone that they shared, darn PDA. after that they went to amamis haus and played monopoly. Ouma cheated.  Yadayadayada they lived happliy ever after 

END

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you had a good time reading! Comments are very much treasured, so it would be super rad if you told me your opinion! It's absolutely not necessary though. Just you reading through this mess makes my day!  
> However, if you are going to leave a comment, please be aware that I will be gone on a Very Important Science Trip, so I won't be able to reply before Friday! I promise promise that I will try to respond ASAP! (If I get any responses before I leave, I'll do my best to reply to those.)  
> Anyway, I hope you have a great day! Please rest up and take care!


End file.
